Friday, December 30, 2016

Think Positive, Leave Facebook

Everyone on Facebook is telling me 2016 is the worst year ever, and 2017 can't come soon enough because they think we've hit rock bottom. In all honesty, and selfishly, I had a great time in 2016.

I was able to attend seven weddings this year. While my wallet took a temporary hit, I loved getting blackout drunk with an open bar & dancing celebrating the love of all of these couples with my closest friends & family, who I rarely get to see these days.

Four of these weddings took place in California. I was a bit annoyed at first  flights, lodging, and rental cars aren't cheap. After all four trips, I was actually sad I wasn't going back this year. The coast, desert, giant sequoias & redwoods, beaches, fog, wine country, and food. It was all amazing.

In the field of recreational accomplishment, things really went my way. After a lifetime of utter failure in intramural & rec league sports finals, my Philly soccer team won the league thrice this year. And after repeated humiliation in bar quizzo, I finally won for the first time with some work friends. Can't complain about that.

A lot of other firsts happened this year too. I ate at my first Michelin-starred restaurant, gave my first wedding speech, and purchased my first pair of Jordans (Air Jordan 1). After a year of searching, I finally got a pair of adidas NMDs  persistence pays off. I attended my very first sporting event in a suite, where I watched the Phillies get walloped by the Blue Jays. This also marks the first time I've ever used "wallop" in any form in writing.

Continuing with all the firsts, but on the family side, El Grande Burrito & his wife had a kid, so that's my parents' first grandchild & my first nephew. I helped The Little Taquito get her first job at the same company where I work, so that means I'll get a referral bonus. I think. Anyway, all the Mirasol children are now employed, but we're still on the family phone plan. Not ditching that ever.

I was highly entertained this year. Movies were pretty awesome. You've probably seen or will see Rogue One & La La Land, but if you get a chance I highly recommend The Handmaiden. Don't bring young kids or parents though.

TV blew me away. Stranger Things, obviously. Thanks to HBO, my pre-Monday, Sunday night dread turned into "I fucking wish it was Sunday night already" for twenty weeks. Game of Thrones easily had its best season. Westworld kept me engrossed each week.

I went to my very first tribute band show this year. The opening act was a Nada Surf tribute band, which still confounds me. The main act was a Weezer tribute band that played all of Pinkerton. I hadn't heard any Pinkerton songs in so long, and it made me really appreciate how good it was.

When I think about all of these really fun & awesome things that I experienced this year, 2016 actually was a pretty good year. It's making me realize that all of this Facebook negativity is bringing me down. I need to get away from all the political rants, fake news, and general negativity  at least for a little bit, which is why I'm taking an indefinite hiatus as of January 1.

I'll definitely be back at some point, but I'm going to start the year without Facebook. I'll still be on a couple of the other social media platforms because no one is bombarding me with their thoughts on safe spaces or email hacks. Plus, pictures & videos are fun.

Thursday, July 07, 2016

English is a Piece of Cake

"You can't have your cake & eat it too."

Such a baffling phrase. Why would anyone get a cake & not eat it?

That was the big topic of conversation last weekend between Sanrio & I. After 6+ years together, the intellectual fire still burns.

But, seriously. Why, in fact, would anyone want to get a cake & not eat it? That's absurd. Cake is delicious. Cake is the best. If you disagree. let Jim Gaffigan tell you all the reasons why cake is the best. There really isn't any other explanation needed.

Cake isn't a throw pillow. I don't see cake & think, "Oh hell yeah. That'd look good on my kitchen counter."

When I see cake, my first thought is "attack!" Then, a few other things go through my mind:
  1. I hope it's the good kind of frosting. (The good kind of frosting has a texture that's thicker & more "solid." It some instances it looks like royal frosting, but it's actually softer. It's also loaded with sugar. Think about frosting from Magnolia Bakery or Sweet Revenge. The bad kind of frosting is the type they give you on grocery store cakes – the kind that is really soft & not that sweet.)
  2. I hope the cake is fresh. (Nothing worse than stale cake.)
  3. Should I share this cake with someone? No... 
  4. Yes. Yes, I should share this with someone. I need to fit into my pants.

And now back to the original phrase. After some in-depth internet sleuthing, I found out how the phrase originated & its literal meaning. It seems my immigrant understanding of the English isn't up to par, so I'll just go back to my country & eat cake there.