Monday, May 04, 2009

Cheesy 90s Rock

If I could go back in time and be part of any band, I'd be in one of the huge 80s hair bands like Bon Jovi or Motley Crue. That was crazy! However, out of pure curiosity, I'd also consider one of those cheesy, early-90s alternative bands. I'm thinking Toad the Wet Sprocket or Gin Blossoms.

How'd I get to internally debating this completely random scenario? About a week ago, I had a completely random urge to listen to "Walk on the Ocean" by Toad the Wet Sprocket. I hadn't heard the song in forever and was totally into it, so I thought to myself, "I need to make a cheesy early- to mid-90s rock playlist on YouTube!"

Interestingly enough, the only songs I could come up with were by Toad the Wet Sprocket and Gin Blossoms.

Toad the Wet Sprocket
Walk on the Ocean
All I Want

Gin Blossoms
Found Out About You
Til' I Hear It From You
Hey Jealousy
Until I Fall Away

I started thinking about the touring experience with those bands, and it must've been completely different from Motley Crue.

On one hand, you have Motley Crue. They sang about sex, women and drugs, and they had the sluttiest & hottest groupies dying for a chance to contract an STD from (or give to) Tommy Lee or Nikki Sixx. It must've been a nonstop party. And from what I remember from VH1's Behind the Music, that's exactly what it was.

On the other hand you have Gin Blossoms. Listening to their music is like a kiddie rollercoaster. When I hear one of their songs I think, "This is catchy. This is a great song. I really like it." But when I actually pay attention to the lyrics I think, "Geez. This is sad and depressing." Take these lyrics from "Hey Jealousy":

Cause all I really want is to be with you
Feeling like I matter too

If I hadn't blown the whole thing years ago

I might be here with you


Stop beating yourself up. Years have passed. Let it go. You're in a popular band now, so have fun.

With songs like that, touring with the Gin Blossoms must be the complete opposite of touring with Motley Crue. Do they attract emotional, intellectual artsy groupies? Would their parties even be fun? Would they party at all? When I think of a Gin Blossoms groupie, I picture Heather, Josh's college girlfriend from Clueless. If you recall, she was wearing her coffeehouse beret and discussing something BORRRING with Josh before Cher totally owned her with her Polonius correction.

Heather: It's just like Hamlet said, "To thine own self be true."
Cher: Hamlet didn't say that.
Heather: I think I remember Hamlet accurately.
Cher: Well, I remember Mel Gibson accurately, and he didn't say that. That Polonius guy did.
(Sidenote: While we're flashing back anyway, take a moment to let this fact sink in. Before we realized he was an anti-Semitic drunk who is about to get cleaned out by his soon-to-be ex-wife, Mel Gibson was one of the sexiest men alive. Ha!)

Aside from letting you know that I'm probably the only person who would wish to be a Gin Blossom, what was the whole point of this post? Because I want to give you a Music Monday video.

Ultimately, I was unsatisfied with the fact that the only cheesy early- to mid-90s alternative music I could remember was made by Toad the Wet Sprocket and Gin Blossoms. I knew there had to be more, so I dug deep and tried to remember something...anything from my middle school years. And I came up with this classic: "Sick of Myself" by Matthew Sweet. Definitely mid-90s cheese. Pay close attention, and you'll even see his Airwalks. Oh hell yeah.

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