Friday, December 21, 2007

Overhead Issues

I flew to Detroit from New York on Wednesday evening. Surprisingly, my flight was on time. This was probably the first flight I’ve taken out of New York that was on time and didn’t depart at 7am in the morning.

As expected, the flight was fully booked. I usually get a little nervous prior to boarding because I’m always worried I’ll be one of the last to board the plane and won’t have any space for my carry-on. I avoid checking baggage at all costs because the airlines usually lose it, and I feel like I wait an eternity to pick it up from the carousel.

Luckily, my ticket indicated I was in boarding Zone 4 of 6. I felt I had a decent chance of getting some overhead space for my bag. It turned out I had tons of space for my bag. I would’ve even been fine if I was in Zone 5.

In any case, one some idiot who boarded after me had one of those roll-aboards that don’t fit width-wise (i.e., shorter side against the back of the compartment) in the overheard compartment. The only way it would fit was to place it inside length-wise (i.e., longer side against the back).

I hate these bags that only fit length-wise. It is a complete waste of space. These bags eventually take up spaces where two bags could’ve fit, and they leave this useless two-inch space where you can’t put anything except maybe a jacket. And that leads me to another annoying article in overhead bins—jackets. Don’t waste space in the overheads with your jackets! Would it kill you to keep the jacket on or on your lap for the duration of the flight?

Anyway, back to this idiot with the roll-aboard. His luggage was the last one for that particular overhead bin. He tried placing it width-wise because that’s the only way it would even go in. Unfortunately, it was just a hair too long for the bin to be shut, so he tried slamming the door. No luck. What does he do next? He just smiled, giggled a little bit and raised his arms to the sides in the “I don’t know” action and sat down.

What the hell does that solve? Did he think the flight attendant had a magic technique to make the door close? This guy was in his 50s. Certainly, he could’ve been a little more responsible and actually contacted someone for help. Instead, he just sat there like a child waiting for mommy and daddy to solve the problem.

Thankfully, the flight attendant was a semi-bitch who saw the whole thing unfold and called him out on it. The guy was still smiling in his seat when the attendant asked him if the bin could close. Obviously, the answer was still “No.” So she says to the guy, “Well this plane isn’t going anywhere until that bin is shut.”

I desperately wanted say something like “You got served!” Instead I just watched in delight as this guy embarrassingly stood up and just looked around like a clueless moron. Finally, the semi-bitch just came to his rescue and moved stuff around for him and found him some space.

Why did I tell you this story? I hate lazy people who think others will always take care of problems for them. I almost wouldn’t have minded being delayed just to see this guy stumble around the aisle for another 5-10 minutes.

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