Friday, April 28, 2006


I originally said The Hills was starting May 24, however, I was mistaken. It will start May 31 according to Cythia Turner's Cynopsis. My apologies.

I watched One Tree Hill two nights ago. It was the first time I had watched that show in about 5-6 months. I have to say I was definitely interested again, but that situation those kids are in is ridiculous. You have high school seniors getting RE-married, living in their own apartments, and I believe there are only three parents on the show. Craziness. How are these kids not in jail?

Wednesday, April 26, 2006


I was watching some Champions League futbol, and I got to thinking about the World Cup. My friends and I were debating who would win. We decided the Brazilian national team would have to go on a coke bender before each game if a country other then them are going to win.

Personally, I hope the United States wins the World Cup. Why? Do I all of a sudden have all this American futbol pride? Absolutely not. I just want them to win to piss of the rest of the world because nobody in the United States is going to give a damn. If you win the World Cup in any other country, you’re a national hero forever. You could die the next day and your life would be complete. If the United States wins the World Cup, they might mention it after a story about a Bonds home run or Kobe Bryant scoring 60 points.

In conclusion, I want the United States to win the World Cup so that the entire world will be pissed off at us for something other than Iraq and G-Dub. (Ending sidenote: My least favorite chant in the entire world is when crowds start chanting “U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!” In fact, I’m adding it to my Top 5 Things I Hate in Life.)

Saturday, April 22, 2006

Lots of Happenings

According to The Laguna Beach Hook Up, The Hills will premiere on May 24. Obviously, I am very excited.

I will be in New York City from April 26-May 10. I will be looking for permanent employment. I also may try to get some temp work while I search so that I don’t go broke. Wish me luck.

I have some free software recommendations for you guys. If you have a lot of pics and videos on your computer, download Picasa. It’s another amazing program from the geniuses at Google that is great for organizing and editing your visual files. If you are a Blogger, download Blogger for Word.

Good job to the Red Wings on their double OT win last night. The NBA playoffs start this afternoon. I’m very excited. I may just stay in front of the TV all weekend.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

And Knowing Is Half The Battle

It’s official: Distracted drivers are dangerous

Thanks for the tip. That was the headline for a news story on about a study on how distractions affect driving.

Do we really need to waste money on this stuff? Can’t this money be spent on cancer or AIDS research or be given to some starving kid in Africa? Common sense would tell us that not paying attention to the road is obviously a bad thing.

What are some of their findings?

Drivers dabbing on makeup, chatting on cell phones or eating breakfast are three times as likely to be involved in a crash as more attentive motorists.”

- No way?! You mean putting on makeup while driving can cause a crash? At least now I know. And knowing is half the battle.

"All of these activities are much more dangerous than we thought before," said Dr. Charlie Klauer, a senior research associate at the Virginia Tech Transportation Institute.

- Did you only think they were semi-dangerous before? Are you going to stop eating breakfast on the drive to the institute now that you know that eating breakfast is much more dangerous than you previously thought? Maybe you should donate the money you save from skipping McDonald’s in the morning to all those starving kids who got deprived because of your silly study.

“Drowsiness is also a problem, the researchers found. They said drowsy drivers are four times as likely to have a crash or near-crash.”

- So being on the verge of sleep is bad for driving, huh? Hmmm. I guess I’ll have to take that into consideration from this point forth.

“The study said any look away from the road ahead -- even a glance in a rearview mirror -- could be deemed a distraction.”

- Don’t they teach you in drivers’ education that as a safety precaution, you should periodically check your rearview mirrors and sideview mirrors just to be aware of your surroundings? Don’t they? Don’t they?

Why are studies like this approved? Isn’t there an internal review board at every university in the country that has to approve all studies? At least you could’ve given the money to NASA. Even though no one cares for their missions anymore and it somehow seems like 73.2% of their missions fail, at least new technology is being developed that can improve our everyday lives—perhaps even save our lives in the event of a car crash.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Other Bloggers

I decided to add another section on the side bar entitled "other bloggers" mainly because of the blog entitled This Place is Dead Anyway. Read the entry Portnoy Walks the Streets of New York. From the entry, it appears that this guy may have gone to the University of Michigan, but who knows? Regardless of where he went, I find his writing to be quite humorous--especially Portnoy Walks the Streets of New York. Read the whole thing. You won't regret it.

Random Thoughts

“Carlo has been away for over 4 months. His native land of the Philippines has convinced him that Filipinos are the best and that coming home to America may just suck. So we're throwing him a party for his return to the States and his new-found pride of Filipinos. And to convince Carlo that he's missed so much quality in America since his departure, we're throwing him an American pride party full of all the red white and blue you can think of.”

That was from the Facebook party e-vite regarding the super cool welcome back party that my super cool friends from the Americas threw for me on Friday. It was loads of fun. Thank you to all who graced me with their presence, and special thanks to Chelle, Sara, and Michele for organizing such a wonderous event. It was a little like a flashback to the college days—full of booze, beer pong, flip cup, and puking. Good times all around. Pics should be up within the next 48 hours.

I’ve been a bit lazy in getting acclimated with the popular culture in the Americas. All it would take is for me to listen to the radio and watch TV. This sounds easy enough, but I’m actually finding it rather difficult. Listening to the radio is horrid. I’ve thought popular music has been going down the toilet for quite some time now, but the degree to which it sucks is magnified when you leave the country for 4 months and come back to even worse crap. Every song is overplayed. Every rap song I’ve heard so far sounds exactly the same—some black guys I wouldn’t understand without in deep voices going “uh huh,” “yeah,” and “whoa.” Don’t even get me started about the song that talks about falling in love with a stripper. Seriously. John Haverlund said it best after mockingly rapping T.I.’s “Rubberband Man”: “What is this song even about? Have they run out of stuff to rap about, so they wrote a song about a rubberband man?”

I feel disappointed that I haven’t mustered the energy to get back on track with television. I used to watch TV about 5 hours a day even when I worked. I watched everything. My favorite shows included Laguna Beach, VH1’s Best Week Ever, the Real World/Road Rules Challenge (Gauntlet, Inferno, etc.), One Tree Hill, The OC, Everwood, and pretty much any dating show on MTV. When I decided to leave the country, I was legitimately disappointed that I would miss The Gauntlet II and that I might miss The Hills. Luckily, The Hills isn’t on yet, but 8th & Ocean is going strong and I hear it’s hilarious. I just found out it’s on at 10:30 on Tuesdays. That’s all I know though. I have no clue when anything else is on. I’m going to have to find when every other show is on, AND catch up on all the old episodes. This requires a lot of downloading on Limewire. Do I really want to do this? Not really. Will I do this? I’m not sure yet.

Luckily, some shows don’t require me to watch episodes in sequence. The shows I’m talking about are Yo Momma and Parental Control. Yo Momma, hosted by Fes a.k.a Wilmer Valderrama, is a show where people just make Yo Momma jokes. It’s a tournament style competition where they take people from different “regions” (or cities) and they do head-to-head “battles,” similar to rap battles but with yo momma jokes, to see who advances to the final four…of yo momma jokes. Who thought of this show? Was this the brainchild of Fes? This is ridiculous. “I’m looking for someone from Torrance to win the battle against East LA tonight.” That’s what one of the hosts said before beginning the yo momma battle of Torrance, CA. There are some good jokes though. “Yo momma’s so stupid, she thought Tupac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.” That was from the battle in East LA. I think they have a shot at representin’. I wish I were that witty in 5th grade. What is even more fantastic is that Fes and his 2 co-hosts convene after each battle in the final four and actually talk out who wins. It’s a yo momma competition! What do you convene about?

I was introduced to Parental Control by the Hottest Guy on Campus. His prediction before I even viewed one second of the show, “You’re going to love this. This is going to be your new obsession.” I was hooked within the first 5 seconds. Parents who disapprove of their child’s significant other get to interview other prospective candidates and choose 2 new dates for their child while the current significant other has to sit on a couch by the parents and watch the date—all while talking trash to one another. Why anyone would agree to go on this show, I don’t know. Obviously, the relationship must not be that great if your significant other wants to date 2 other people in front of you, then choose if he/she wants to stay with you. I recommend this show to everyone.

I know this old news to a lot of you, but it’s new to me dammit! Let me enjoy my foray back into pop culture!

I just saw a commercial for Just My Luck starring Lindsay Lohan. She just doesn’t look hot anymore. Good thing Samaire Armstrong is in it! She played Anna in the first season of The OC and Ari’s secretary from the first season of Entourage. I don't even really like blondes, but I always thought she was hotter than Summer.

Anybody who hasn’t seen the movie Waiting needs to see it immediately. It should be out on DVD. Watch it. Hilarious.

I’ve also started my employment search. I’ve applied to several companies in California. If anyone knows any openings out there, let me know.

Some other excellent yo momma jokes:

Yo momma’s so crazy, she breaks down more than Mariah Carey

Yo momma’s breath is so bad, she made Altoids go on strike.

I’m watching a re-run of My Super Sweet 16 for the girl in Scottsdale, AZ. Some girl just used “off the hook” in a sentence, as in “This party is sooo off the hook.” When was the last time you heard that phrase?

I just decided I’m not going to edit this post because it’s a random thought post. It’s the bastard child of blogging. It doesn’t deserve editing.

I’ve been trying to think of why I don’t like Chicago. I have no urge to move there. I don’t even consider jobs that are located there. It’s a surprise to me that I’ve been there on three occasions to visit my friends. I’ve decided that it was because when I was young, my family would go there every two years to visit some obscure relatives—like parent’s 2nd cousins or something like that. On my list of things I hate in life, being forced to mingle and BS with obscure relatives easily makes my top five. Ever since I took those trips, I have never liked going to Chicago.

Rihanna is pretty hot. Her music—not so much.

I know I’ve said this multiple time before, but The Real World really sucks. The last one that I really enjoyed was Real World Seattle. After that, the only tolerable cast came from San Diego. The only good thing that comes from new seasons of The Real World is the pool of new contestants for The Inferno or The Gauntlet.

I’ve also started my employment search. I’ve applied to several companies in California. If anyone knows any openings out there, let me know.

Monday, April 10, 2006

A Little Lonely...

I am now back in The Americas. It’s cool to see my immediate family again, but it still feels a bit lonely. I got to see my cousins, uncles, and aunts pretty much everyday. It was so much fun to play with all the little brownies. It isn’t really like that over here. I’ll see my two best friends tonight, so maybe that’ll put me in a happier mood.

I do get to drive today. I’m finally going to try out the Chrysler Crossfire. I hope I don’t crash. It’s been awhile since I’ve driven for longer than 5 minutes.

Until next time…

Friday, April 07, 2006

My page has been updated with five new bookmarks. Go to the "links" section on the right for directions to the page.

See you in The Americas on Monday.

Until next time...

Thursday, April 06, 2006

High School Shenanigans

For three days last week, I took a trip back through time and relived those jubilant teenage years known as high school. How did I do this? Well, I agreed to hang out with my 17-year-old twin cousins on Friday and Saturday, and I agreed to emcee my 18 year old cousin’s debut—her 18th birthday party. Yup, I spent three nights with high schoolers and their friends. You may think I’m sketchy, but I don’t really care what you think because I know deep down you think it’s a bit funny and are extremely jealous.

My adventures in high school started innocently enough when my aunt asked if I’d take my cousins out once school was out for the summer. I said, “Are you sure you want me responsible for your boys? My mom cried when I was in high school.” (This is not a joke. She actually did cry because she was worried about my crazy shenanigans. This was despite the fact that I was in the top 10 percent of my class every year and graduated with the 15th highest GPA.) Being one of my many cool aunts, she said, “Yes! Of course. They’ll be fine.” In that instant, the lives of her first-born were in my hands…

I really wasn’t sure what teenagers like to do on The Island. I know they like to do the usual teenager things, but things are a bit more relaxed here—as in nobody really asks for ID, so there’s a good chance we could just go to bars instead of the standard house party. I suggested going for drinks at a bar by work, then heading to a techno concert headlined by Hed Kandi…yes, a techno concert. If that doesn’t scream “Carlo has been in Asia way too long,” then I don’t know what does. They were very excited at the prospect of this idea, so it was game on.

Friday comes along and they pick me up in front of my office. I get inside the car, look around, get introduced, and immediately feel very old. I’m in the presence of four 17-year-old boys and a 15-and-a-half-year-old girl. Why the “and-a-half” you ask? This will be explained later. They have not eaten dinner, so we proceed to the McDonald’s down the street to meet up with two more of their female friends who turn out to have surpassed the “15-and-a-half” mark and have actually made it to the age of 16. This, however, does nothing to make me feel less old.

After “dinner,” we walked to the bar and I notice that even my attire gives me away. I’m dressed in a long-sleeved button-down, and the others are dressed in various attire indicative of their high school age. It wasn’t that long ago you were in high school; you know what I’m talking about—Hollisteresque.

The waiter at the first bar we go to notices the young age of my companions and immediately says, “We check ID.” I probably should’ve said something after saying they wanted to drink at a wine bistro. Next, we try Ice: Vodka Lounge. Nice bar, nice music, and they let us in. So one of my cousins and I go up to the bar to order three Jack & Cokes. After the order, the bartender asks for an ID. As I’m reaching in my back pocket to grab my wallet, my cousin just turns around and bolts for the door. I almost busted out laughing as I handed the bartender my license. She actually thoroughly checked it before handing it back to me. Apparently, as long as one person is over 18, everyone can drink. What a great country. I wish this policy had been in effect in The Americas. The girls ordered drinks separately at the table and didn’t get carded. I guess the policy of letting girls drink no matter what is in effect all over the globe.

We receive our drinks, and I start asking people how they know each other and all your standard BS questions just to see how everyone here is connected. I also ask how old everyone is. The guys say they’re 17. Two of the girls say they’re 16. The girl in the car says, “I’m 15-and-a-half.” I guess those first 6 months of her 15th year are very important. I jokingly say, “Whoa! This is illegal! I’m old!” Then, 15-and-a-half says, “Not in this country.” At this point, I am afraid. I laugh it off and shift the conversation to the local sports franchise or something unawkward like that. I’m afraid she might do something bad to me like the lesbian secretary at our sister agency across the city—she groped me when I tried to shake her hand. It was very traumatizing.

It’s time to go the show, but before we go I have to buy their friends cigarettes. Yes sir, I bought a pack of Marlboro Lights for the young biscuits. We get to the show where they met more of their male friends. The music was really good, but drinks were somewhat expensive so I did not drink too much—I was also with teenagers, so I thought that getting wasted alone would be downright sad. Anyway, my cousins kept trying to get me to dance. I, however, was very aware of my surroundings…mainly the minors around me. Though I am huge fan of a show about a bunch of high schoolers—Laguna Beach—The Dirty Burrito does not condone sketchiness around minors. Sketchiness around people my own age is fair game (e.g., anytime Clean Taco, Rachelle, or Hottest Guy on Campus is in the picture), but even I have some standards and morals. My cousins said “C’mon! Go dance.” I say “NO! There is a girl that was born in 1990 standing 5 feet away from me. There is no way I am dancing anywhere near you people!” Let that sink in…I was in the presence of someone born in 1990. Anyway, I just ended up wandering, getting a few drinks, and checking the scene out. I’d check back once in awhile to make sure my cousins weren’t taking ecstasy. They weren't—phew.

We finally ended up leaving at 2:30. My cousins didn’t have a curfew that night since I was with them. They ended up having a good time and wanted me to come out again Saturday night so they could go see this band called Urbandub. Of course, I said yes. I remember the feeling of being able to escape curfew. I didn’t want to ruin their fun. Plus, this sounded more chill, less tiring, and devoid of 15-and-a-half-year-old girls. As an extra added bonus, Urbandub is actually a good band. Download First of Summer.

We went to Capone’s Bistro to meet up with two of their friends. It was a pretty intimate venue. It was probably only 1500 square feet. It’s roughly the size of a 2-3 bedroom apartment with a living room and kitchen. The band lit the place up—one of the best performances I’ve seen and I only knew one of their songs.

After that, we met up with my unofficial social director, Marj. She was out and about and only lived a block away, so she decided she’d have a drink before heading home. By the way, Marj is 4 years older than me. This means she was born in 1979 and sharing drinks with boys nine years younger. When the boys got up from the table, she said to me, “Wow! They really are young.” I said “Yeah. They can't even grow facial hair yet. Now you know how I felt last night.” And laughter erupted from our souls.

That was Part I of my high school adventure. Part II involves me emceeing my cousin’s debut. What is a debut? Basically, it’s like a Sweet 16 except you celebrate it at 18, and only girls have it. If MTV Asia did a show in the Philippines modeled after My Super Sweet 16, it would be called My Super Sweet Debut, but they wouldn’t allow any of the guys like Hart or the kid who called himself a divo.

In any case, I co-emceed this party with two of my cousin’s close friends. I was really afraid to do this for some reason. But as soon as I started speaking on stage into the microphone, I didn’t want to stop. I felt at ease to the point where I wanted to get rid of my two co-emcees and just do the rest of the party myself. Oh well. Sharing is caring.

It was my first debut because I don’t associate with Filipinos in The Americas. I was very surprised. It was an awesome party. Her band was there. Everyone was giving toasts and speeches. Her friends were singing songs to her. The DJ was playing some good music. Everyone was into it. I don’t think I’m quite accurately reflecting the fun, but just trust me. It was fun. And there were high schoolers.

Fortunately, none of them were making weird awkward comments to me that night so I was able to enjoy the party to the fullest of my abilities. There was also some high school drama at the end of the night when one of her friends was crying because another friend was dancing with the boy they both liked…or something like that. It was awesome. Not for the girl that was crying. I felt bad for her. But I thought it was awesome. I don’t know what this makes me. Oh well.

Those were my high school adventures from Friday-Tuesday. For those of you wondering about pictures…I forgot my camera for the techno concert night and didn’t think it was worth bringing out for the Urbandub concert. I did think a birthday party qualified for pics, so check those out.

I’m coming back to The Americas on Monday.

Until next time…