Thursday, October 06, 2005

Free At Last

Hey Guys,

I just wanted to let you all know that I resigned from The Corporation today. I would like to debunk all the rumors right now; I did not resign because William was better than me at dishing out random facts or that my horrid secondary play in Flag Football was undermining the legacy I had built as a championship Kickballer. I just didn't feel comfortable in the merchandising role.

You may or may not be asking yourselves, "What the hell is Carlo going to do with his life now that he doesn't have to sit in a cube all day?"

Though a rather large void will be left by sales forecasting and resolving inventory issues, I actually have a great task ahead of me: finding a new job. I know some of you thought I was just going to stay in my apartment all afternoon, watch daytime TV, drown in a pool of forties, and write incoherent thoughts in this blog. However, depending on how much of my disposable income I choose to spend on leisurely goods such as food, alcohol, retail purchases, KY Jelly, ninja classes, etc., I only have enough money to remain unemployed and solvent for about 5-7 months. I am concentrating on going back to Michigan and have already sent resumes to numerous companies, including Chipotle, which would be quite glorious since I am very knowledgeable about their products.

I will remain in Minneapolis for the next month or two. I will probably spend my time job-hunting, working out, cleaning, and most importantly—writing in this blog.

I will leave you with this quote from the immortal Charles Barkley.
On Magic Johnson's return to basketball: "We're just playing basketball. It's not like we're going out to have unprotected sex with Magic."



P.S. I am not completely holding myself to the state of Michigan for employment opportunities. If any of you have connections in California or NY, I would love to hear from you. I would love to hear from you even if you don’t have connections, but your friendship will immediately rise in value if you can provide me with a lead.

P.P.S. Mom and Dad, if you are reading this I resigned from my position on Thursday, October 6. I will not ask you for money….yet. I will be home soon. I know you will be very excited to see your first-born child, who saved you money by getting AP credits in high school and graduated college in 3.5 years, who got in some youthful trouble with alcohol but never got arrested, and picked up Michelle when you guys were really busy at work. I love you guys.

1 comment:

  1. Damn Carlo you resigned from the Corporation......Now I have another person to go agaisnt in the job search.


    HAHA congrats or sorry....which ever one works out better ?